Chris Stanley's Bazaar

He Says...   By Chris Stanley  Put your black mark in the box he says We'll give you whatever you need It's the only way to be sure he says Of protecting the rights of our creed I'm a very reasonable man he says As he shows off his suit cut so fine All I want is what's best he says So I can banish these terrible crimes I knew we could do it together he says I'm glad you believed every word Now let's get us back to the top he says As he marks those he doesn't prefer We're taking a few extra coins he says To cover the blots of the past You'll get it back soon as we can he says While they wonder how long it'll last It's clear that the problem's not us he says As he speaks with a reasonable voice I know we're a generous people he says So I think we should all get a choice It's not good to see such disturbance he says When I've done all I can to be fair The people like us are all welcome he says

You can call off the search party, folks. I'd heard that people were so distraught that my blog was on hiatus that calls to the Samaritans trebled. I'm not one to blow my own trumpet, but I've had emails from both the Leave and Remain campaigns, bricking it in case we go into the EU Referendum without a word from me regarding overuse of adjectives or whatever. Well, I'm sorry, but it was for a good reason. I'm a week late with this news, but close friends and people who like to hack random social media accounts will know that I've now finished the first draft of my novel! I don't think I needed the exclamation, but I've put it there to tell you when to clap. So do it now. I'll wait. You didn't do it, did you? I'm not surprised. You've always been a disappointment to people. Now that the dust has begun to settle on a project that has taken me (from first knockings to last orders) about seven years, 215,000 words, two laptops,